Ed Covelli will be taking a rare vacation starting next week. I understand that he will be going to an undisclosed location where the secret government scientists that created him will rebuild him from scratch, replacing each part with modern updates that will make him better, stronger, faster and more realistic looking than ever. Or he’s going golfing, I don’t know, I wasn’t really listening.

What I do know is that he will be leaving on July 6 and returning to work on July 22. During that time, I will be available to assist you, and you can reach me in the usual ways, like calling the main number at 212/201-1465.

[Written by Kem Tekinay]